I want to motivate others who feel heartbroken, confused, lonely, depressed and feel as if no one would ever love them. I'm letting you know God loves you, He sent His son Jesus to die on the cross for you because of that immense love that He has for you. He formed you inside of your mothers womb and knew you by name. In Him you are made perfect, in Him your weakness becomes His strength and He will never fail nor forsake you. I know I was made for a greater purpose. My time on earth is only temporary and in this time I just want to inspire others to look for God. I assure you if you don't believe in Him is because you have not had a true encounter with God, when you do you will never be the same. Be Blessed, feel free to ask anything. I am at your service.
In brief to tell you what I've been through.
At the age of 3: I used to get beat by my mother's boyfriend. Not hit for dropping something or to teach me right from wrong. Beat till I bled, cried, screamed. Held upside down, hit in the shower. His friends and him use to scare my brother and I for halloween, chasing us around the house in costumes. I woke up once to "spider man" touching my leg and not knowing if anything else went down. I saw my mom slice him once after an argument, that was last time I saw him. At this age my dad stopped looking for me, still doesn't look for me but I'm okay.
Age 9-10: I left my grandmother who saved me from my hurt when I was three to be with mom again. I experienced being broke, starved and domestic violence. Super skinny, bags under my eyes. Not able to get things I enjoyed, sometimes not able to eat because of no money given to my mom from her new boyfriend. My mom choosing a man over my brother and I. My mom being dragged across the floor like a mop, smacked on, cursed upon. Cops threatening to call BCW, finally again back to granny.
Age 13: Experienced "love" puppy love. I felt happy and then of course the heart break. A guy who gave me attention now left me for a friend. I was devastated and sad. Coming from a person who didn't have a father figure 24/7 and her mom away from her it was terrible. I experienced low self esteem, depression, self infliction, desires of suicide. I experienced hate and resentment.
Somewhere in between this time I went to a retreat, learned to forgive, forgave let it all go was free and happy.
Age 16: I found love, true love I met him when I was heartbroken at 13 became friends and finally we were together.
Age 17: Deception on myself, made mistakes, broke guys heart, still together made it through it all. Pregnant.
Age 18-19: Married, beautiful daughter. Experienced betrayal from friends, criticism, jealousy, enemy trying to destroy my marriage. Currently in victory, in love with God, my husband and baby girl. Right now I'm spiritually growing, in college, devoted and there is no place I would rather be.
Brief captions. In all this time what God did? Comforted, healed, restored, helped me forgive, love, had mercy on me. I experienced other things of the world but those I could share in a more personal level. Point is that it wasn't a easy life wasn't the worst but for a kid that's a lot to undergo. Having to cry and feel lonely isn't good. Anger, hate, resentment, low self esteem, desires to kill yourself, etc I've felt them all but God changed me, he mold me and made me whole again.
I don't know where I would be without his love. Be blessed, questions just ask.